Make It Till You Fake It.

Zambian men refuse to celebrate their wins because we’ve been conditioned to think that every other man is struggling, and we cannot rub our achievements in their face. The Zambian man’s humility is nothing more than a successful national program to limit him from enjoying the fruits of his labour.

You’d think it is illegal in Zambia to post a photo of a beautiful sunset. The rationale is that you cannot enjoy nature while so many people are homeless. You must stay indoors so that homeless people are not offended. 

If you want to invite ridicule and derision for having ambition or success, I recommend you identify two Zambians and swim your fastest lap on the night they procreate. 

You’ll be in absolutely good company some nine months later. Because there is no better place to minimize your achievements than Kaunda’s patch. This is where you sweat and bleed to build a life you must pretend you do not have. 

To be a Zambian man is to live in compliance with complacency. You must blend in. Do not show any slither of success. Dumb down. 

Then we’ll be alright with you. We’ll absolutely love and latch on to your humility. We definitely want you to win but you must accept your Oscar or Ballon d’Or award by thanking Zambians first then you can thank God and everybody else. Zambians come first in your success. Or else. 

No wonder the Zambian man hides his wins.

The terms of his success and how he must celebrate it means he must never really embody who he is, what he has achieved and the joy, car, house, holiday or mid-morning walk. 

He lives his life building a legacy he is not allowed to be proud of. He must pretend to struggle so that his client doesn’t worry about making him richer. He must be profitable but not so much so that his children and those of his client go to the same pricey private school. In essence, he must sit down, be humble. 

So he’ll spend his entire life working towards pretending he is only surviving. And he will compromise to keep at bay fellow men that want him to be humble or they’ll find a discrepancy in his tax affairs. Or discover an extramarital affair.

It creates a society of men that are crippled by comparison. Afraid to say what they mean, go for their goals and openly celebrate their hard work.

We constantly have to walk on eggshells. To make sure that people do not think we’re proud of what we have achieved in our careers, businesses or marriages. 

Shrinking ourselves into being average cannot be good for our wellbeing. We are not living.

Encouraging you to be humble as a successful man does not exempt you from being the breadwinner. But for the love of God, don’t you dare have salted butter and an egg to go with it.