Please, Not Another Marathon!

Men are running in all the races, every week, every month. What’s the plan? 

Every urban Zambian man and his dog is now running a marathon. It seems there’s one every other weekend in the country. So with all this – at times performative – running around, what’s the true benefit to our health and wellbeing?

You’ve seen the pictures, updates on WhatsApp, and medals. It all seems in fashion these days. Every man is running some race, isn’t he?

The family man marathon, career marathon, entrepreneur marathon, and loving husband marathon. Name it. We’re in a race. Trying to win against depression, financial ruin, alcoholism, substance abuse, erectile dysfunction, and nature. Take your pick. There’s a marathon for it.

And we’re up for it every time that searing, yellow ball rises on the horizon. Dressing up in our running gear as fathers, sons, husbands, blessers, entrepreneurs, and employees. All of us are trying to get to the finish line with enough left in the tank to enjoy the highs and lows of the race. 

Let’s not be mistaken about this. The marathon happens on an entirely different running track from the rat race. 

The rat race is nothing more than a sprint. You put on your best outfit and outrun strangers with salaries. Every month, quarter, or financial year comes with a notch lower or higher on the ladder. Comes with leave days too. Retirement.

But a marathon is to undress a fully clothed elephant in the room. Life’s marathon is a chore, and you don’t even sign up. You’re born into it.

Bailiffs take your car? Keep running. Close down the business because of COVID, and get to the finish line. Girlfriend, you haven’t proposed to post her wedding photos, chin up, and increase pace. Lose your three children in a house fire? Summon God Himself to run with you. A man’s life is the ultimate marathon, and he must run. 

If you commit to being a father, husband, entrepreneur … for many years until the finish line, nobody is running that race with you. Life’s marathon is not a chill in brand new Adidas running shoes. It’s an unforgiving cycle of tough financial, moral decisions about what to do. For your troubles, all you get is a participation medal. 

No podium finish. Just you on a cold iron slab, chilling with an undertaker. 

You pick your marathon and stick to it. You can’t run the fatherhood marathon and drive recklessly as if you don’t have children waiting at home. Or the entrepreneur marathon and spend all your company’s December income on return tickets to Dubai. 

These marathons, eh? A lot of fit women at the starting line, great scenery along the way, everybody buzzing for the course ahead. But you must finish the race. Stick to it. 

You can’t run the masculinity marathon in a group. Some men run to problems, while others run away from them. The goal is to finish yours with as much dignity as you can summon. Hopefully running in the right direction.